Thoughtful writing authored and shared by members of of the Thinking Collaborative community to support others on the journey.
Sustaining the Journey
Effects of the Need to Be Right
May 12, 2014
Judith Glaser, the author of Conversational Intelligence: How Great Leaders Build Trust and Get Extraordinary Results, suggests conversations breakdown due to five conversational blind spots. The first one is the assumption we often hold that our perceptions are also the perceptions of others. Our own point of view blinds us to other ways of seeing. Our dopamine levels actually increase when we are right which causes a temporary high. Given that response, we are driven to wanting to be right and to proving to others that we are right.
How often might this blind spot drive us to consult when we might be more helpful by coaching? Or when we are coaching, how might this blind spot cause us to ask a question that has a hidden suggestion in it? And sometimes we might ask a question with the hope that someone gives us the answer we are looking for. It takes high consciousness to become aware of this blind spot in our own speaking and listening. Heighten your own awareness of the tendency as you engage in a variety of interactions this week. Notice under what circumstances it seems to happen most.