Like assumptions, we speak our values and beliefs often without consciousness. These types of abstracting paraphrases assist the speaker in accessing the internal structures that drive his/her thinking and behaviors. Stems can be as simple as, “You believe,” or “You value,” or “It’s important to you…”

They are critical to consciousness in decision-making and problem resolving for both groups and individuals. Often we jump to a first strategy or solution without exploration of the congruence or lack of it with more deeply held beliefs and values. These paraphrases ground us in what really matters in the long term.

Use your time this week in conversation to attune yourself to the values and beliefs being spoken and consciously paraphrase those you hear.